BeautifulHistoria

Can I take a minute to thank my Heavenly Father!

The days when I’ve taken the little bit of energy I have at nap time to paint - God’s not only helped me get to a stopping point before my little one woke up - but also to help me get everything else I needed done in the day: first and foremost time with my daughter.

Before I started on this goal (and I haven’t really even started yet) I was lucky to get half on the necessary stuff in my day completed. This week I’ve been able to keep the house clean, put meals on the table, work out every day, and still get some one on one time with my daughter. For those of you who aren’t moms - well, that’s a miracle if I’ve ever seen one!

I’d struggled with knowing if I really should take time out of my day to paint - especially since I know my most important job is to be a mom. I could come up with all the reasons why I shouldn’t - but then it really came down to “BUT I LOVE IT” so, I might as well try. If I can’t do it, and it really is too much for me I’ll find out soon enough. And maybe I’m still too early in the process to know if I can keep up this kind of stamina - but for now I feel like God is not only saying: “painting is a good thing for you to do” but also: “I will help you improve your talent” I love having his help! Without it, well I’m pretty sure I’d just be exhausted with very little to show for it, and now I’m exhausted with a few paintings to add to my days. SO COOL!

I was talking with a friend today about changing one’s life for the better. We both agreed that it takes a long time, and it’s not always easy to change one’s set-in-habits for new and improved lifestyles. When my husband and I first got married we both agreed that exercise is important, but neither one of us had the habit instilled in us yet. We would exercise once in a while, and we’d always go on a sunday walk together - but being active some of time doesn’t do the same thing for a person as a good hard cardio and weight workout. That was three years ago, and we’re finally (as of a few months ago) to a point where we work out a good three times a week. It’s made a big difference in our lives - but it took a while to get where we are. As much as I love the idea of a sudden night to day switch with no time between yesterday and today - It’s never worked that way in my life - has it in yours?

Now that we’ve got the exercise thing down I’m starting to work more on our nutrition. I’ve never seen anything so confusing. What one person says is good for you another person says is not really that good. Guess we’ll try what we can and see what makes us feel the best, most energized and on top of our mental game. While I’m excited to eat 100% healthy, I still love my frozen pizza and fast food chicken sandwiches. So - we’ll see how long this change takes.

In the meantime - I finished another painting. This one I did in two settings. I’m pretty proud of myself with so little time sitting at the easel. I’m sure I'll look at it later and see all the mistakes and things I could have done better - but as for now, I really like how it turned out.

The picture is the one titled: Orchids for a friend in the gallary. 

The first picture is the underpainting (something new I learned) and the second picture is what I did in the second sitting. I’m calling it done. It was fun - and faster than anything I’ve done before.

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Let's talk about budgets!

My husband and I decided to live as frugally as possible in order to save more for our future and our children's future. We’ve done this for most of our marriage - but I think this is the first month where i’ve been 100% on top of the budget and not spent anything outside of what we agreed - WOW! Talk about HARD!!

What’s the smallest budget you’ve ever had for food for a week? And how many people were you feeding? I have to take a moment to brag - and also to show my thanks to my family. The last two weeks combined we had about $10.00 to spend on groceries. Last week we were able to have fajitas, chicken and rice and even some apple pie - plus food for all the other days - all under $5.00. I’M SO PROUD OF MYSELF!! But, I couldn’t have done it without peppers and tomatoes from my sister in law's garden, thanks sis! Or fresh apples from my grandma's apple trees - FRESH APPLES! Doesn't get any better than that!

We ran out of tortillas, our bread flour, and white flour last week. So I made homemade tortillas from wheat flour and grinding up some barley for barley flour. For the pie crust I found some almond meal in my cupboards, then I ground some flax seed for a binder (did you know that flaxseed can be used as an egg substitute! SO COOL!) and some more of our wheat flour. The pie crust actually turned out to be something I liked more than other pie crusts I’ve had before.

I TOTALLY STAYED IN MY BUDGET, tried new things, and still made really tasty foods for my family. Go me

P.s. so all of you don’t think we don’t have money - we actually have enough to buy food for a month - I just made a costco trip AND a winco trip the first part of the month.. Leaving me with $10 for the last half of the month. Yeah.. that probably wasn’t the smartest move.

I worked on some art today - I feel pretty good about that too. My art teacher sent me home with homework - to do my own color wheel - but to do one with both warm and cool color of all the primary colors. It was fun to see that a cool yellow with a warm blue is what gives us the green we think of as “green” but is so hard to find in nature. A warm yellow with a cool blue gives a different kind of green.

Then she had me mix the complimentary colors together to see what that did to the colors. Well.. you can see for yourself what happened. Who knew you could get so many colors with 6 original colors? And I’m sure you could get even more than what I put down. It was a fun two hours.

..ok .. just kindding. you can't see the picture. at least not on this post. I can't seem to post pictures on this part of my blog. so i'll just post it in my gallary. It's not overly exciting - but still a fun afternoon.

I get ahead of myself far too fast. I see what I want to be able to do - and I run before I’ve learned how to crawl.

The good news? I’m exhausted. I once told my sister in law that my goal was to be exhausted by the end of the day - she looked at me like I was crazy (which I might be.. But I actually thought it was a good idea) and said “why!?”

I looked right back and said “because then I’ll feel like I accomplished something that day - and when I work hard throughout the day I sleep better, feel better about myself as a person and don’t worry what my purpose in life is” not that I’m trying to avoid anything by working it out of myself - only that I REALLY REALLY enjoy being at the end of the day knowing I did good day's work. There’s just something so rewarding in knowing I worked hard that day.

Well, I’ve had three exhausting days in a row now. I haven’t done a whole lot of anything different, only tried to add one thing to every day: painting.

Though I must say, I wouldn’t have been able to do it without God. I PROMISE!! Being a mom is busy enough, why try to add anything else to my day!? I already feel exhausted!! It’s because creating something makes me feel SO GOOD!

Do you ever remember being a child and your parents would give you a certain amount of play time - whether it’s at the park, a friends house or simply being outside of the house. I remember thinking those play times NEVER felt long enough. Time would always seem to go buy so fast: hence the saying “time flies when you're having fun.” That’s how I feel when I paint. At times it’s chore, but one that I love and can never get enough of.

Thankfully Along with trying to do a daily painting (or as the case is right now: do something everyday that deals with art.. Because, let's face it - I have a lot to do before I’m ready to actually start) I also recommitted myself to God. My dad was a big proponent of how “putting God first makes everything else fit into your day” and I know it’s true.. I just forget to put forth the action some days. Well, yesterday I felt like I did pretty good job of putting God first. I didn’t necessarily DO anything different - I just focused my thoughts more toward him. Because I did that I received some amazing inspiration for my church duties on sunday - as well found even more time than I had planned on to paint. I thought I might be able to get in an hour or two of paint time yesterday during J’s nap time (J is my little girl about 2 years old right now) but she actually slept for three.. For those mom’s out their you know what I mean when I say THAT’S A BIG DEAL! And extra hour of nap time, wow - that DOES NOT HAPPEN, EVER!!

It’s was great!

But boy I”m exhausted. guess I’ll sleep well. What a soothing thought to lay on my pillow tonight.

I wanted to start this blog to showcase my art. But then I found out that I had very little to write about, and even I lost interest in my blog. And there it sat for 2 years collecting dust.

Then I thought, I should really look into it - see if it’s still the same, is it even still there? Yup. it is. Well, that’s good to know.

Every once in awhile I get these really big inspirational ideas, make the PERFECT plan on how to execute it - and then enevitable something comes up - not just on art either - with EVERYTHING in my life.

Well, here I am, with another big idea. And, you guessed it, it involves my blog.

The big idea? You ask. “Daily paintings”

I don’t really know a whole lot about this movement, if there are “rules” or stipulations in order to become a “daily painter”. I don’t much care what anyone out there says. I like the idea of painting something everyday simply for the practice.

In my younger years (well, younger than now.. Because, mind you - people tell me every day I’m still young. I wonder when that will wear off…. Huh.. well, doesn’t really matter, does it.) I learned to play the violin. My mother, ever so invested in my interests signed me up for private violin lessons. I loved it. I still have my violin and pick it up from time to time - and even feel guilty when I know it’s sitting in its case collecting dust for long of intervals of time. One thing I learned as a violin student is “muscle memory” or - my muscles can retain memory on their own - but only if I give them something to remember. How are they going to remember? By making them do the same exercises EVERY DAY! The everyday part was hard as a teenager - after all, there’s friends to see, places to go, homework and chores to avoid. And so, while I dreamt of being an amazing violinist - I really didn’t put as much into it as was required. The philosophy however stuck!

And now, here I am - hearing for the first time of this thing called “daily painters.” okay - life as a mom is a million times more busy than that of a teenager - and if I don’t get the dishes done, no one will clean them for me.. Ever again! I can’t just ignore the chores anymore, or the other millions of things that need to happen in a day.. But wouldn’t doing all of those things be just a LITTLE more worth it if I could take just an hour or two to paint. (and even some days pick up that not so forgotten violin too)

This much I do know about “daily painters.” the goal is to pick an amount of time (say 30 days or so), get a bunch of small canvases (or other painting surfaces) that are small - say post card size. Because it’s small, it won't take as long to finish painting the canvas - making it possible to paint one a day.

I’m excited to get going on this. I suppose most daily painters sell their tiny art - I don’t know if I will or not. For me art is about so much more than the money - and I want to learn the discipline of becoming a master, train my eyes to see the truth around me and learn how to release the beauty I feel in my heart.

I won't be posting pictures for another two months, I have a few projects I need to finish before I take on such a task. However, I will try to post some thoughts and comments every once in a while before I actually begin.

This is exciting guys! I hope I can stick through it. May God bless my efforts - and in putting him first help me to accomplish even more in my days than I can possibly do alone.

Sometimes lifes hardest lessons are the best ones for us to learn.

That's about all I can say about my experience with Novemberfest. I learned alot for my first time ever trying to sell my paintings and getting them out for the public to see. I put a lot of work into them, and realized I'm really not a salesperson. I put so much a part of me into my work and to put them out there made me feel really vulnerable. I will continue to paint because I love it. But to try and sale them again might take more courage than I currently have. One day I may try it again.

I will say this however, I did not fail. I knew that I was stepping very far out of my comfort zone. I knew I would learn alot, and I did. If anything I succeeded in helping myself to grow in ways I could have never done without taking that step.

Eleanor Roosevelt herself said "Do one thing every day that scares you.” well, Eleanor - I think I've definatly done that, now it's time for the next step.. which is to keep going. Though I may need time to lick my wounds for a second I am very serious about this bussness and I love painting too much to give it up.

HAPPY WEEK OF THANKSGIVING!! well that was exciting! I love thanksgiving - being with family is wonderful any time of year - but it seems like the big holidays are when the most of us can get together at once.

My family doesn't have many big traditions (except to eat turkey of course) or small ones either when it comes to thanksgiving. We do however have one tradition that we started a few years ago. Along with the forks and knifes that are set beside each plate, is also a sharpie. Why a sharpie? How does that help you eat turkey? Well - it doesn't help us eat turkey, but it does help us eat pie. You see, my mom has this tablecloth we always set the table with at thanksgiving. It's white, with lots of words. Every year we have to write on the table clothe what we're thankful for from that year. As the pie comes out we tell each other what we wrote down before we can get our own slice of pie. I think we've all slightly associated pie with being thankful (at least on that day of the year) and boy can I say - “I sure am thankful for pie!!”

Thinking, however, of what I'm thankful for – I think it's appropriate to mention on this blog, how wonderful it's been to receive all the support and help with my decision to start selling my art. My dad has been instrumental in all of this. He's put a lot of work into this for me. He built most of the frames that will be displayed with my paintings as well as the zigzag wall the my paintings are hanging on at the fair. It's amazing how a frame can add just that much more to a painting, as well as a good display. THANKS DAD! I love you and really appreciate all the love you've shown me in helping me with this project.

I also have to thank my husband. He could have said “no, don't sell your paintings. We don't have the money for a business venture, no one will like them, you don't have the time, it's too risky...” and the list goes on and on. While it's true we have very little money he's been great to work with me in balancing the checkbook to make this work (even if it was with a little complaining here and there). He also understands that this makes me happy and is willing to support me in that. THANKYOU HUBBY! I LOVE YOU!!

And last, but not least: thanks you all of you friends and anyone reading my blog or looking at my pages. It's nice to know that my work isn't just pretty for my family (who have to say it's nice) - thanks for giving me a chance and boosting me up. I still don't know if any of this will work out or not, but I have sure had fun so far, and hope to continue having fun in the years to come.

I'm sitting here with baby, she is exceptionally cute today. With that said I'm getting more and more excited about selling a few peices of my art at the Logan Utah 2014 Novemberfest this year. I have been working really hard to get peices finished and it looks like I'm going to be ok! That makes me really happy. There's still a lot to do - but there's an end in sight now.. at least for the moment. I've made several moments in my days since my last post to stop and remember why I paint - I feel like it has not only helped me to re-love it, but there's also a magic that seems to be happening - I don't feel like I have to go back several times to get the look I'm going for. It's amazing! Ever notice how when you get a little burnt out nothing seems to work out - but when you as a person are doing ok - everything else seems to be just a little better? That's what I'm experiencing right now.

Along with that - It must be known that my days are not always just super perfect - with rainbows, butterflys and unicorns. Recently I went to the UDVC conference for my work (UDVC = utah domestic violence coalition) A lot of the things they talk about are heart-wrenching stories. It's hard to think what many people who go through domestic violence do just to survive - or that some don't even realize that's what they're going through. I know, you say "how can someone not know if they're being beaten up?" There are so many facets to domestic violence that many people go through every day without realizing that's what happening. In many places they only recognize the physical part of domestic violence - but the part that leaves bigger scars and is harder to cope with is often emotional abuse. Those scars you cannot physically watch heal, and often they don't heal. I could go on and on about specifics - but the most important part is: are you happy? Is this what you want your life to be like? Do you and your partner build each other up or tear each other down? 

I hope you have found someone who takes care of you - and also that you do the same for your partner. I love the song lyrics by Jack Johnson that say "Love is the answer, at least for most of the questions in my heart. like: why are we here, were do we go and how come it's so hard"

If you are not happy that doesn't mean it's domestic violence - but it can help you look for answers or resources . I love esspecially that last part of the song "why it's so hard" love IS hard. For example: lets say you've finally found the person of your dreams, fall in love, get married etc. then a year down the road  you realize it's not all roses, sometimes it's all thorns. I've definiatly experianced that in my own marriage - however through communication and caring for each other we were able to work it out and compromise. A marriage is not easy, but I would never go back to being single. It's often the harder things and difficult things that remain in our memories for longer and soon become sweet. We say things like "remember that time when we were newlywed, broke and so happy" yes - many people say that. I'm going through the broke, newlywed and newbaby stage right now and have to remind myself that "these are the good old days" as Pink says. I don't want to look back on my life wondering why I didn't live life more fully. I will live full of life right now, I will see the good things that I have, I will appriciate the hard times as I'm going through them.

However - It's also my opinion, that Domestic Violence, no matter how much you want to work through things - should NEVER be permitted. However you decide to deal with that in your own life is  your own decision, but for me: I think it's very wrong. 

If you feel the same as me you can still be a part of this movement to make domestic violence unacceptable in your own culture. Help others to be happier by standing up for something important.

I like this video that was shared with me https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzF3OyRYX7I ...maybe you've seen it before? This guy doesn't have to say anything - but what he does makes all the difference. I hope I can be more like that - and be better about sticking up for what I believe, even if not a word is said. after all: actions speak louder than words. 

Thanks for reading. 

Starting a blog is exciting. To introduce my blog I will say that I am not up on a lot of the big things that happen around the world (I leave that and all the big news updates to my husband) but I do tend to be a bit more of a deep thinker about the simpler things in life. I've found that sometimes the most profound thoughts are often inspired by the simplest of things. Since this is a website for art - I can try to keep to the subject, however I have no guarantees. My life - as well as yours, I"m sure - has so many more aspects to it than just one. Take this morning for example: I was walking to the store and back to pick up an order of canvas's that arrived, and realized it had been too long since I had just taken a walk - looking around me reminded me of how beautiful this world is. So many people (myself included) are too busy trying to keep up with things, or even get ahead - that we forget to take it slow once in a while. When I took my walk I remembered why I even loved painting in the first place. For the last two months I had been painting almost non-stop, to the point I was exhausting myself and becoming burnt out. But what for? To meet a deadline? Of course that's what it was for - but that's not why I paint. I had become confused into thinking painting was all about meeting the deadline - but I will tell you now that I've had some clarity - painting has nothing to do with deadlines, and everything to do with loving what I'm doing and doing it for no other reason.

I hope this inspired you to take a break from the normal monotonous routine's you may have found yourself in - and remember the real reasons why you do what you do - whatever it is, I hope it's because you love it. And if you no longer love it, figure out why or find something you DO love. 

Here's to doing things for the right reasons.